Embarrassed about online dating

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As the wise prophet Pat Benatar said, “Love is a battlefield.” You gotta play smart and that means using all the tools at your disposal. DO NOT wear a hat and sunglasses in your profile pic, either. Why would you do that unless you’re a couple looking for a threesome or are polyamorous? And don’t use a picture of you and a baby, unless it’s yours. Has no one ever complimented your looks or personality?

Where conventional dating is more like a water balloon fight, online dating is like storming the beaches at Normandy. Here’s some simple advice on filling out a dating profile on OKCupid. No one wants to hunt through your profile to find out they’re your sibling/cousin/goddaughter/best friend. Again, we don’t want to dig around to find out they’re your nephew/cousin/godson/best friend. No one cares about your scenic vacation photos, not even if you consider yourself a “photographer”.

Did you sign up for this dating site while sitting at a red light? If you had time to create a profile and log in, then you have the time to fill out the profile, jackass.

Online dating is not Amazon Prime with free two day shipping of a brand new girlfriend. You’re trying to make yourself look good, not lame. Say you love horror films and underwater archaeology, Civil War reenactments, and brewing your own bathtub mint juleps.

This is not a text, and there are no character limits. Make the message personal and you stand a far greater chance of getting a reply.

If you’re tempted, check out our expert online dating advice Singles of every age, from every walk of life are trying internet dating, and if you’re reading this maybe you’re thinking it’s time for you to look online for love too. First, the bad news: internet dating is not a quick fix.

But, once you’ve decided which site is right for you –if you’re here perhaps you’re planning on signing up for eharmony’s service – you might be at a loss as what to do next. It’s highly unlikely (though we admit not completely impossible) that you’ll meet the man or woman of your dreams on Day 1.

You know how annoying it is to fill out a job application and list all the info you have in the resume you brought? Let your profile be your resume, not your job application. The question is obviously asking what you do for a living and what your big goals in life are.

DO NOT write “I’ll fill this out later.” There is no later. Are you a teacher, bartender, sales clerk, mortician?

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